sorry, i know it's been like a week since i posted. i been trying to get a house, get stuff squared for my new job, etc. plus, i'm just having issues and i haven't felt like being my normal, witty, charming self. i try to reserve my depressed self for other avenues.
today i'm stressing because i have to obtain a government secret clearance (hence the statement "i'd have to kill myself")for my new job and i may not be able to because my finances are currently fucked, and apparently that's not really considered trustworthy. anywho, i have to wait a few days to find out if that's going through. and if it isn't approved, i will have no job. and if i have no job, i can't rightly get into my own house, what with no income.
so anyway, i'm in kinda a self-deprecating mood right now. my life is not completely in my control, i'm out of tequila, i didn't find a house to live in today, i may not actually have a job, and i was in band in high school! band i tell you! (save the "this one time, at band camp..." jokes. i've heard them all before!)
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sidenote about me: i absolutely hate not being in control, which is why flying scares me. so, when i go off like this, that's probably why. something is out of my control. and i have kids! lord, i'm in for it.
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