the african experience

i got a match with ted on match.com. seemed nice enough. (are we noticing a pattern here?) so i give the go ahead for him to IM me. we talk once or twice and kinda lose interest. he lives kinda close, in tucson. he's a business analyst by day, political hip hop artist by night. this is too good for me to make up, people. he just likes to educate the masses. if he gets paid, that's just a bonus.

like i said, we talk a couple of times and i'm just not feelin' him, so i let it die out. last week i got an IM from him saying "we seem to keep missing each other" and i thought to myself "really? i thought i was avoiding you rather well". and since i'm a little too nice, i get sucked into conversation. here is an exerpt:

ted : well i was thinking i could introduce you to the african race if you have not already been-lol (first bad sign - the lol!)

ted : sound like a good idea

issheinacoma : hey wait! i never agreed.

ted : i didnt say you agreed

ted : hahahah (almost as bad as lol)

ted : i asked if it was a good idea to you

ted : thats all

ted : ahahahahahah (and again!)

issheinacoma : there wasn't a question mark so i thought it was a statement

issheinacoma : gotta get that punctuaion in there (we all know what a stickler i am about grammar)

ted : yes teacher

ted : !

ted : you too innocent to experience Africa?

issheinacoma : as long as "experiencing Africa" means dinner and a movie, than nope.

ted : that would be experiencing hollywood

issheinacoma : and experiencing Africa would be...?

ted : me

ted : some of the finest genes on earth

ted : lol

ok, so it wasn't exactly over the top porn or anything, but a little pushy and presumptuous considering we've barely spoken and i've given no hints that i like him! are all internet boys like this. some loud little voice in my head is shouting "YES! give up before it's too late!" but it's just too funny to stop. i gotta keep seeing what's out there... maybe it is too late for me. but not for you all. go! save yourselves! meet people the old fashioned way. in a bar... drunk... saying something like:

"did it hurt?"

"did what hurt?"

"when you fell from heaven"

now that's the way to do it.