thanks to my best friend for that title. i was telling him more of the story of last night and he insisted that i add this stuff to the blog because it's too good not to share. either that or he likes to watch me make a complete fool of myself. like face licking isn't enough!
anyway, here are a few points i failed to mention in the first posting.
1. at one point, when i asked tim (that's his real name, btw) to stop lookin' at me, he actually, factually turned around and sat upside down on his couch, as in head where the feet should be. huh? don't ask me why. my little kitty brain cannot possibly comprehend the inner workings of this guy's mind.
2. he blew a raspberry on my stomach. you know the things you do to little kids to make them giggle hysterically? yeah, doesn't have the same effect on grown women. who knew?
3. ummm... how shall i put this? i couldn't feel his penis. granted, i never reached out and tried to touch it, but usually if a man is sufficiently turned on, you can tell. am i right? so either a) he was not turned on (impossibility seeing as how i'm hot) (not) (but really, if he's that into me, he's gonna get turned on when we're making out) b) he taped it to the inside of his leg to avoid any embarrassing brushes or c) it was very small or nonexistent. any of those cases will hold up in a court of law that the man is mental.
4. he spoke in this odd, modified british accent. i knew it was an accent because i've heard his normal voice. i have no idea why he did it! once again, can't comprehend, don't want to.
5. he would kiss my nose. like in the middle of kissing my mouth, he'd reach up and kiss my nose. was that supposed to be cute?
anyway, for those of you that face licking and premature confessions of love wasn't enough, here is further proof that the guy was, is and always will be, a weirdo.
1 comment:
yes, i had drank when i accepted the second invite. but i also accepted just so i could be positive he was not the one for me. we had only met once before, so... he was crazy!
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